Kirkcudbright is 'Dy-no-mite!'

Kirkcudbright, a recent destination for one of our famous day trips, is a lovely, arty town located at the estuary of the River Dee in Galloway.

First order of business: I had to learn how to pronounce the name properly. It is most definitely not pronounced how it looks: kur (to rhyme with fur) KOO (to rhyme with fu manchu) bree (to rhyme with tree). So that's kur-KOO-bree, emphasis on the KOO. I guess I should apologize for the title of this post, then. Sorry. Sorry Kirkcudbright. Sorry Jimmy Walker of Good Times fame. Sorry.

There are several noticable things about Kirkcudbright. The ruin of Maclellan's Castle dominates one end of the town, where Castle Street and Cuthbert Street meet. I didn't think the castle was particulary nice to look at, but see a nicely drawn town map here.

Another noticeable thing about the town, something I haven't seen much of in the UK, is wide streets. They aren't as wide as Salt Lake City's streets, or the streets in Las Vegas (which you need to file something akin to a flight plan before you cross), but they are very wide for British streets.

Kirkcudbright has one of the more interesting WWI memorials I've seen. It is a statue of a man with a sword and shield protecting a small boy. Usually they are just a stone pillar with names on them. Something interesting to note is that the WWI memorials in these little towns have a lot (I'm not kidding) of soldier's names on them, about twice as many as WWII. I'm always moved by seeing those lists of names, especially when in a very small village. I look around and think my God, nearly all of the men from this little town were lost. And then twenty years later, another world war. It is sobering.

Another thing you notice is that the town does pride itself on being home to a lot of artists. I think a town that promotes the arts is a very good town indeed. In keeping with the arty feeling, the citizens seem to have agreed that it would be really cool to paint their houses interesting colors, so you do get that seaside town feeling when you look around.

Here are a few pics of Kirkcudbright. Enjoy. 

Click for the larger pic and you'll see the house near the end of the street is purple

This lovely church was turned into several private flats

You better not misbehave in Kirkcudbright

 

 Loved Ones Lost at Sea

'To The Glorious Dead: 1914 - 1918'

Fishing boat in Kirkcudbright Harbour along the river Dee

 You are not allowed to drive your car into the harbour

Beachcombing in Galloway

Standing on the beach looking back at Carsethorn, The Steamboat Inn, and shrouded Criffel.

Galloway is a wonderful place for beachcombers. In one visit to Kippford in June, we doubled the size of our collection of sea glass. Just the other day at the beach at Carsethorn, we doubled it again.  Even found a chunky blue bit of glass. I wonder if sea glass just isn't a big deal here. The beaches all over Puget Sound are usually picked clean. I made some truly wonderful finds in the non-glass areas as well. We'll have a bit of show-and-tell just below.

And in a bit of related news for you, I have started a new blog.  This one is dedicated to beach-combing pics with a little bit of info thrown in. It's a work in progress, but there are already pics posted. Please join in the fun. I'm looking to promote it and improve it.

A bit of an Oriental ceramic piece, smooth to the touch

 

 

 

 

Wonderfully faded Dutch ceramic piece, no bigger than a ten pence.

Blue row boat.

It's all about the blue.

Village Life 2: The Sounds of Dalbeattie

respice prospice.
learn from the past - look to the future.

I notice sounds here in the UK even more than I did in the States. I think this is because everything is so new to me. I have to pay close attention; I have to listen well, particularly here in Scotland, in order to understand what people are saying to me. The accents and indeed the vocabulary is very different from England and from the States. It takes a bit of getting used to, and I admit, if someone is a fast-talker I miss about half of what is said. I listen for key words and tone of voice, and look at facial expression to capture meaning in context; failing that, I look to my partner who very kindly translates for me. I am usually understood when I speak (though not always). I think this has more to do with speaking in a slow, western drawl than with the overall mildness of my accent. In fact, the very notion of my 'mild accent' is beginning to erode. It took me a while to admit that I even had an accent; my denials were met with guffaws. I switched to espousing the idea that, although I might have an accent, it is without question a very, very mild one. This was met with bemused looks, and pats on the head. Of course I have an accent. It is a western drawl of the North American variety. Okay. Fine. Let's move on.

By far the most pleasant sound we encounter is the friendly banter between locals that we hear from the downstairs café. It opens at 9am and by 9:30am a group of regulars are in and chatting. We can't make out what is said but we hear the tone, cadence and accent. It is punctuated with much laughter. To my ear it sounds roughly like: hee hah hoh ahhh, oh aye HAHAHAHAHA! It's like a babbling brook of friendliness. It always puts a smile on my face.

And that last bit (oh, aye HAHAHAHAHA!) is standard and oft heard in Dalbeattie. As is the greeting 'HiYAHH.' Emphasis on the drawn out YAHH. It's not like a karate chop (HIYA!!) like Miss Piggy is famous for; and it's not as clipped as the greeting I commonly use (hiya). Anyway, we think it is a local custom. We haven't heard it said like that anywhere else.

Another local custom is for the young of the village to hang out at The Cross on Friday and Saturday nights, into the wee hours of the morning. They chat, shout, sing, and slurr incomprehensibly as the night goes on. Living in noisy Canterbury with 40,000 college students was good practice for living at The Cross. To be fair, there isn't much in Dalbeattie for the young to do on a weekend, and the fact that they are out (in good weather) singing and laughing instead of texting or playing video games or creating teen pregnancies is something to be glad about. However, I must admit to sometimes praying for a rain shower that lasts from 11pm to 3am. They tend to scurry away when it rains. Which should be most of the winter, I would think. The sound of rain is a lovely thing in itself.

Because we are in the center of town where there are restaurants, small supermarkets and pubs, we also hear the early morning delivery trucks roll in. We hear the drivers operating the tailgates and moving racks of things around as they make their deliveries. It's the sound of commerce; this, in a small town, in a difficult economy, is a welcome sound. Doesn't bother me a bit. Not even the especially loud 4am delivery truck.

One of the most soothing sounds of Dalbeattie is the rushing of the burn. Note: burn is a Scots word to mean small river. The burn flows right through the center of Dalbeattie towards the River Urr. We like to walk along the bank and listen to the water. And there's always Dalbeattie Forest with it's chirping birds and chattering red squirrels. The forest is adjacent to the town, and once inside, it's amazing how quickly the sounds of human endeavor drop away.

The sounds of Dalbeattie range from the friendly banter of locals to machines of commerce to the soothing sounds of nature. All within a small radius, a ten minute walk.

on the bank of the burn

aprapos of 'HiYAHH' this is the only bit of graffiti i've discovered in Dalbeattie thus far.
note the artistic shadow of the camera and my hand.
for comparison purposes, see my past blog entry about graffiti, the peace of wild things.

Village Life 1: Loads of Granite

As I write this, I'm looking out one of the windows at our place in southwest Scotland. Our granite building is a good couple of hundred years old and situated at the top of a T junction called The Cross, in the center of a little village called Dalbeattie. That's Dail Bheithe in Gaelic, meaning something close to 'valley of the birch trees.' The window glass is old and uneven and makes the village outside look a bit wobbly. I can see the stately granite building, marked 1883, at one corner, and next to it the bright blue building that houses one of the local butchers. Beyond that the steeple of a church points skyward.

On the other corner across the street is the Kings Arms Hotel, another granite building. It is a small hotel, restaurant, lounge and public bar. The public bar has its own entrance and that is where the men drink. You could go in there if you are a woman, but all of the patrons will stop drinking, stop talking, and turn to stare at you. Not unfriendly exactly, but you can hear a pin drop. Ask me how I know this [smiles sweetly]. I do enjoy the locally brewed ale they have on tap. The staff is friendly, the lounge and garden lovely and the food gets an A.

But back to the granite. Dalbeattie is famous for its granite, which is extremely hard and light grey in colour. As I'm sure you've gathered, many buildings in the town center are made of it. The local quarries supplied granite to places worldwide, including London, Liverpool, Manchester, the United States, and Sri Lanka (go figure). It has been used for buildings, lighthouses and roadworks (as crushed granite). Dalbeattie is the first place in the world where granite was polished on a commercial scale. This started in the 1830s and created a boom in granite polishing as Dalbeattie granite workers took their craft to various places around the world.

Did you know that granite is a natural source of radiation? I prefer my radiation from natural sources.

we live above three shops: a wonderful little restaurant (with delicious food of the sort that makes cardiologists rich) and two undertakers. 'nuff said.

small fern. big granite wall.

One Year On...

Hi folks.

I've got the computer situation sorted finally. I have a little netbook. It's a Windows environment, which I haven't used for about four years. Has Windows gotten better in the last four years, you ask? Nope. But I'm running Windows 7 Starter which seems fine and is far less a memory hog than the full version.


Today is the one year anniversary of my arrival in the UK. Hooray! I've enjoyed it and the UK government has seen fit to let me stay for two more years, at which time I'll apply for Indefinite Leave to Remain. That sounds like mixed messages, doesn't it? Leave to remain? Huh? Another example of BritSpeak. There was one the other day, too, when my partner asked me if her car was centered in the parking place and I told her she needed to pull up about three feet. I meant pull forward and she thought I meant pull back. I couldn't figure out why she had reversed. We exchanged confused looks and then had a good laugh. It's never dull, except possibly for this particular blog. I apologize for the lapse in entries.

We are right in the middle of our move to Scotland. All our stuff is in store waiting for the removal man to load it on his truck. I'm looking forward to settling in to a quiet life in the village. After busy Canterbury I'm sure it will seem quiet in our little town even though we will basically be living right in the center of the High Street. I'll update you all on our adventures refurbishing the property and getting to know the locals.

Southwest Scotland

Hi Folks. Here's the promised entry on our road trip to southwest Scotland. But first a couple of updates.


You might wonder how the coalition government I've written about is getting on. So far so good. They're planning to balance the budget within four years and create a surplus by year five. We'll be having cuts that will make Margaret Thatcher's government look generous, like Santa Claus even. There's no need to do this on such a tight timeframe, so it would have to be something political, like the fact that there will be another election in five years. Hmmm. I suspect that combining once opposing forces is causing some fuzzy thinking. The normally clear and concise Nick Clegg, leader of the GlibDems, wrote a recent Op-Ed piece in the Guardian. He trumps any of my bad sentences and wins the award for Best Incomplete Sentence Using Both a Colon And a Semicolon:


A new government but, more important, a new kind of government: plural, diverse; a Liberal Democrat-Conservative coalition that defies the rules of old politics.


Wow, Nick. Congratulations!


In other news, the little laptop I've been using for the last 18 months (kindly updated and supplied by my wonderful partner) has had a nervous breakdown. Too much writing. As we have much to do to prepare for our upcoming move to Scotland, and as I can access the internet by hiking up to the University library, we are not in a hurry to replace it. So if you are not getting replies immediately to your fan letters, that's why. Just thought I'd let you all know... all four of you.


Our trip to Scotland was very good. We drove (and when I say that I mean my partner drove while I assisted with the map) up to Dumfries and Galloway to visit the flat we'll be moving to in a couple of months and to check out the area. If you have not been to southwest Scotland, it's lovely. After being in busy Kent for the last ten months, the first thing I noticed was how much less crowded that part of Scotland is. There is a lot less traffic, though they still drive like bats out of hell. At least they have more space in which to do it.


The landscape is generally rolling green hills sectioned by stone fences and dotted with sheep. Lots of sheep. There is a wonderful big hill in the area called Criffel, which is (brace yourselves) 1,868 feet high. It stands alone near the sea, so it actually is a very dramatic sight. Dare I say it? It's the Mt. Rainier of Galloway! Truth be told, it's a ways north, and even something as modest as 1,800 feet can humble you at that latitude if inclement weather strikes. So I won't poke too much more fun at Scottish mountains.


We visited the lovely shell beaches near Kippford. We spent time in New Abbey, where the world famous Sweetheart Abbey is, and where we visited a beautiful backyard garden that made us feel as if we were miles out in the country rather than on the main road of a busy little village. We drove inland to the Samye Ling Tibetan Buddhist Centre, the first such place in the western world, established along the River Esk in 1967. It is lovely and I look forward to going back there. It's in a sparsely populated area and you do have to work hard to find it. It's both desolate and lush at once, and you really feel as if you are up in the high country somewhere. They have big hearty gardens there and they are working very hard on new construction of their buddhist college. They are also building a mandala shaped herb garden around a statue of Tara where they will grow Tibetan medicinal herbs. Apparently the climate in this part of Scotland is compatible for a number of Tibetan plants. The statue of Tara is very powerful. I think you'd have to be spiritually numb not to notice her and want to gaze at her.


The little town of Dalbeattie we will eventually call home is charming. It has a fairly bustling high street for a town its size and it is located in a beautiful area. I'll report more on our adventures there in future installments. For now, enjoy some photos from our trip.

This is generally what the countryside looks like

Sweetheart Abbey, founded 1275

A backyard garden in New Abbey with Criffel in the background



The same garden as above, looking toward Sweetheart Abbey

Detail of the shell beach at Kippford

Yes, the entire beach is like this.

The beach at Kippford

Entry gate at Samye Ling (complete with traffic cones)

A garden at Samye Ling

Prayer wheels at Samye Ling

Oddly, they are electric and spin on their own, so those among us who are very tactile were a little disappointed. But we're glad to know the prayers go out non-stop.

Tara keeping watch above her herb garden which is still under construction

June Smorgasbord

We have several little nuggets for you this month. Thoughts on BP and the curious reaction of a select few Brits. A trip to the seaside town of Deal. And a foodie update.

Oil & Politics (or Aw, Tony Wants His Life Back...)

President Obama should stop being mean to BP. After all, how was BP to know that there would not be nearly enough shore birds, shrimp, oysters, turtles, and dolphins to soak up all that oil? BP could not have predicted the serious lack of wildlife necessary for absorption, could they? For goodness sake, the Americans should have regulated things a bit better so that there were more fluffy feathers around. And now Obama’s anti-British rhetoric (the part where Obama says that Tony’s attitude would get him shit-canned in an Obama company) is costing British investors a little of their money. Outrageous! Share value could not possbly have dropped due to the fact that BP slightly underestimated the amount of oil leaking from its well, or that BP’s efforts to cap the leak have not been made often or successfully. Couldn’t possibly be the millions of pounds worth of lost oil that weaken share price or the BP CEO’s perfectly understandable bout of throwing teddy from the pram and saying he wants his mommy or his life back or something. Or his finger pointing. That couldn’t possibly have made the markets doubt BP. It must be that anti-British Obama’s fault.

And the American public! What about that pack of whiners? I mean, here they are getting all this free oil washing up on their shores and they do nothing but complain. It’s just like them. First they started throwing all that perfectly good tea in the harbor a few years back and now they don’t even want BP’s gift of free oil. Well that just takes the biscuit doesn’t it? Clearly Obama is trying to take the focus away from the more important business of the World Cup games (um, soccer for those of you who don't immediately know what I mean. England is planning to win it).

Ah, well, what can be done? Today’s sarcasm moment was brought to you by BP. It seems there are growing cries from a few doddering old fools in the House of Lords, and some rich British CEO’s that President Obama’s rhetoric against BP equates to anti-British sentiment. They say he’s being unstatesman-like and that he is damaging our ‘special relationship.’ And he’s just being a big old meanie to poor Tony. At the same time, these people remind us that BP is a multi-national company, not specifically a British company.

Without wanting to wear out my welcome here in the UK, I have just the teensiest complaint. Listen, poppets, you can’t have your crumpets and eat them too. Either BP is a British company or it’s a multi-national. If it is a British company, then take your lumps without being crybabies. If it is a multi-national, then stop being so hyper-sensitive. And, to quote the venerable Mrs. Slocombe, I am unanimous in that!

Mollie Sugden as Mrs. Slocombe in Are You Being Served?
1970's Brit sitcom.

Deal

We took a day trip to the seaside town of Deal the other day. Somewhat near the little towns of Ham and Sandwich. Yes, really. There was a cold wind from the north or possibly the east whipping along the shore, but the rocks of the beach had been heated by the sun, so from the knees down, it was actually a warm wind. I found several holey stones. Always a good thing. We had a beer in a pub called the Ship Inn. Lovely, warm and inviting. Then a stroll along the high street which had a combination of boutique touristy shops and everyday chains. The high street seems to meet the needs of tourists and the locals, which I thought was charming. There was something about Deal in the paper recently which said that the high street was 'v glum.' I don't agree with that. Note: Brits will sometimes abbreviate very to v. I find that v endearing.

Deal shoreline

They're everywhere. I think the five second rule had long expired.

Yeah, buddy. Ciggies. 30p for a pack.

When in Deal, consider yourself politely warned against bad parking practices.

A garden path in Deal

Foodie Section

And now for a food update. I do enjoy bringing a bit of Tex-Mex sunshine to the table, as mexican-inspired food is not quite as prevalent here as in the States. Here's me showing off. Steak Burrito dinner with all the trimmings: pico, rice, beans, guacamole, rocket salad.

Before

After

Mmmmmmm.

That's it for now, folks. Stay tuned for a report from Southwest Scotland in a couple of weeks. We're headed up to a little town called Dalbeattie. Road trip!

Coalition Government

Opposites attract: new PM David Cameron, Smug Tory, with new Deputy PM Nick Clegg, GlibDem

Here we are, back again for an election update. I said I'd get back to you with the results.

I was right about a couple of things. First, the Tories did secure the most votes, the highest percentage of the overall vote and the most seats. However, as predicted, they did not get the number of seats in the House of Commons required for an overall majority. They needed somewhere between 319 and 326 seats, depending on how you slice it. If you don't have a majority, you cannot govern effectively. They attained 306. They gained a huge number of seats in the election, around 90, and it cannot be denied that they made a major accomplishment with this. There are those in the Tory party who are disappointed with the outcome, largely due to the fact that a few months before the election, the Tories were expected to sweep into 10 Downing Street with a huge majority. Some of the old guard Tories are distrustful of David Cameron's youth and distrustful of his election team and they feel he fluffed it. They didn't like his complicated messages that seemed to change a lot during the campaign. They would have preferred the simple, overly repetitious conservative messages about reducing the defecit while cutting taxes for the rich and the married and keeping out those pesky foreigners. Do I sound a bit biased in my interpretation of their policies? I am, but you get the idea. Keep it simple, stupid. Instead Cameron talked about the Big Society in which government would back off and let people sort out their problems through a combination of volunteer work and private enterprise. Huh? The slogan kept changing, it seemed. Something like Change You Can Believe In...no, wait. That was Obama's slogan. Maybe it was something like Change You Can Spare, or Change that Changes Stuff. Or, considering that their largest donor who, instead of paying taxes, holds all his money in a central American country while simultaneously holding a seat in the House of Lords, perhaps the slogan should have been Change You Can Belize In. I digress.

The other thing I predicted correctly was that Prime Minister Gordon Brown was finished. It wasn't exactly like I thought it would be, but that was the outcome in the end. Because the result of the election was a hung parliament, and because the Liberal Democrats held enough seats to give either Labour or the Tories a working majority (or nearly so), they were courted by both sides to form a coalition government. The first, strongest, and in the end, the best offer came from the Tories. I have to admit, I was surprised by what seemed to be an openness and willingness to compromise that I've never seen before from a conservative party. Being an American, I don't trust 'conservative' political parties as far as I can throw them because they actually are not conservative but right wing maniacs. Whatever happened to the old Republican party? I digress again. Anyway, Labour have decided that the best thing for them was to go into opposition, that is, to be the opposition party in the Commons. This will give them an opportunity to regroup and redefine the party, but also to hold the new coalition government made up of the Conservatives and Liberal Democrats to account. Gordon Brown knew that he would be a stumbling block to that happening if he tried to retain his position as leader of the party. He resigned as Prime Minister and as Labour leader, though it didn't happen by Friday morning as I had predicted (or let's say it wasn't announced at that point). He did have a duty to stay on for a few days until it looked certain that a coalition agreement could be struck. And it must be said, he was very statesman-like and dignified in his last few days in office.

I have to say, I'm impressed that the Liberal Democrats and the Tories were able to strike a deal. I can't quite wrap my head around how parties with such opposing manifestos could move so quickly to compromise but I wish them well. It remains to be seen how long this coalition will last but I suspect a minimum of 18 months though I hope it is longer, perhaps a few years. And I hope that the ideas flying around about a new kind of government, one in which the politicians work together diligently for the common good, is more than just talk. I think a balanced parliament could be a very good thing. I have to admit, I wish this for America, that it will cease to be a two-party system of polarity, cynicism and corruption. I will be watching with interest to see how they get on with it here in the UK.

One difference I noticed is that there is no shaking of hands and inviting the Prime Minister elect to 10 Downing Street for an orientation and welcome. The old Prime Minister moves out and within an hour, the new Prime Minister moves in and they don't see each other. As the timeline for elections is collapsed into weeks or months here, so the timeline for transfer of power is collapsed as well. Interestingly, there is a period of about half an hour when the country has no Prime Minister. The outgoing PM goes to Her Majesty the Queen and tenders his resignation and advises her that a new government can be formed. The incoming PM then has an audience with the Queen and she asks him if he is prepared to form a government. The answer, of course, is yes. And she invites him to do so and it is sealed with a handshake. This happened last night as the Queen welcomed the twelfth PM of her reign, David Cameron. Her first outgoing PM was Winston Churchill. Think about that for a minute; she's seen a lot since the early 50's. The official picture of last night's handshake, also called the kissing of hands (I have no idea so don't ask), was released to the press before Cameron even got out the door. Her Majesty has gone digital, baby. One has to keep up with the times.

Humpty Dumpty and the UK Election

We have an election coming up in the UK. It will determine which party will be in power and which man will be Prime Minister. I can’t pretend to know the intricacies of the British political system. I’m still learning. But I can show you what it looks like from my perspective (which I think we all know leans rather to the left). First, let me say this. The election season is way shorter here. That’s a blessing. I’m finding myself able to listen to election talk because I know there’s an end in sight (and probably because I can’t vote anyway and am more of an observer).

There of course is a lot of posturing and analysis, but it’s absolutely nothing like what you get in America. There is more candour and certainly more room for gaffes. From my perspective, the politicians still look like real people rather than media robots. That’s refreshing. Also, religion plays very little role in elections here. In fact, if you are religious, you have to be careful to say that you won’t let your religion get in the way of your duties to the law and to a diverse and multicultural nation. That, as you all know, would never happen in American politics. In American politics you must assure people of two things: a) you are from the Judaeo-Christian tradition (preferably the Christian part) and b) that of course you are devout and of course this influences your decisions. A huge, huge majority of the British public would be absolutely aghast if one of their candidates said anything like that.

Here are the three main players in tomorrow's election:

The Conservative Party
(aka Tories or as my partner likes to call them, Smug Tory Bastards)
Slogan: Vote for change

The Labour Party
(aka Labour)
Slogan: A future fair for all

Liberal Democrats
(aka LibDems or as I like to call them, GlibDems)
Slogan: Change that works for you

Those are the three main parties, with the Tories and Labour being the dominant (and diametrically opposed) parties. Until recently neither the Tories or Labour have taken the Liberal Democrats seriously. But the LibDem leader, Nick Clegg did so well in the first televised debate and managed to hold his own for the next two that there has been a groundswell of public support. Some pundits say it’s because they represent something different than the usual puppet show of Labour and Tories hitting each other with sticks and shouting incoherently. Other pundits suggest that the public really do want electoral reform which is a huge part of the LibDem manifesto.

Okay, Americans, before you get too bent out of shape about the use of the term manifesto, you should know that all parties have them here. It’s not a commie thing, like we think it is. Manifesto equals platform. Anyway, the LibDems want to move to a type of political system called Proportional Representation or PR for short. You might have around 25% of voters who support a third party, let’s say the LibDem party just for kicks. But these voters are scattered around districts that are drawn in favour of Labour or Tories so even though you have a rather large percentage of people in the country who support LibDem ideas, they won’t be represented in Parliament, at least not at the rate of nation-wide support. The current electoral system here is ‘first past the post.’ Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? The Tories absolutely hate the idea of reform because they want to regain control of the country and Labour hate the idea because they want to retain control of the country. That also sounds familiar I bet. Polarised politics. America is steeped in it, and to a degree, so is the UK. But they have more support for a multiparty system here amongst the public than America does, and this election may bring it to fruition.

There is a very distinct possibility in this election of what is called a hung parliament. Some might call it a balanced parliament. The Tories think this is a bad idea because they think that Labour and the LibDems will gang up on them in the school yard. Polls show the Tories with a lead but not a huge one and second place belonging alternately to the LibDems or Labour depending on the direction of the wind and who is doing the poll. In the event of a balanced parliament it’s possible that Mr. Clegg will hold the balance and agree to give his support to whichever party he can best work with and whichever party will agree to election reform. The Tories give mixed messages about whether they will work with the LibDems. For now they are content to try to scare voters into voting Conservative by saying that a hung parliament means that the UK will be immediately invaded by dark forces and that the British will be seen as weak and indecisive and the country’s credit status will be downgraded and society will descend into chaos. Blah, blah, blah...doom and gloom.

Too bad Winston Churchill isn’t around to hear those claims. As the highly readable and astute political columnist Andrew Rawnsley points out: ‘It is indeed a massive challenge, but not the greatest that has ever faced this nation. Britain’s time of greatest peril in the last 300 years was the Second World War. Winston Churchill successfully thwarted the threat of Nazi invasion and led his country to victory -- at the head of a coalition government.’ Then again, I would point out to Mr. Rawnsley that the current leader of the Tory party is no Winston Churchill.

The Labour Party is currently in power and has been for 13 years. It’s the party of a name most Americans who read newspapers will remember. Tony Blair. Mr. Blair is not the Prime Minister anymore. He’s busy writing books and making peace and discussing religion all over the world...and making loads of money. I think he took a page from President Clinton’s book. It might surprise Americans to know that Tony Blair is a very unpopular figure here. This is due to his support for President Bush’s war in Iraq. Mr. Blair stepped down as Prime Minister after a ten-year run, allowing his Chancellor, Gordon Brown, to ascend to the leadership role without an election.

Gordon Brown is even less popular than Tony Blair. It seems he can’t do anything right. Even people who normally are Labour supporters seem fed up with him. Maybe it’s the economy - while he claims to have saved the UK during the world economic meltdown (a claim which may be true), it is also true that he presided over the UK economy as Chancellor in the lead-up to the meltdown and denied it was going to happen when criticised about his policy of being chummy with rogue bankers. So, you could say that he and his party have lost credibility. Having said that, Labour is the party which introduced Civil Partnership into law. They had the support of the other parties, even the Tories, but it’s highly unlikely a Tory led government would have introduced such a thing. They also brought peace to Northern Ireland, no small achievement. They have funded day-care and the National Health Service and a number of needed public support programs. Actually, it might be fair to say that if Labour had not engaged in the Iraq War, had better sense about bankers, and had chosen to get a handle on expense claims, it might still be well liked. They did do good things for the UK. And they faced an uphill battle to do it after 18 years of Tory rule.

As the former party in power, the Tories had become unpopular themselves. They lost power in 1997 when the people finally became sick of conservative rule. Some people say that Thatcherism ruined the manufacturing base, broke the backs of the labour unions and effectively ruined the public transport system by privatising it. Others (namely the newer, kinder, gentler Tories) will argue that the Labour government has presided over unprecedented job losses, far worse a record than even Baroness Thatcher and her old Tory Party could have achieved. But they forget, or would prefer the public to forget, that it was more likely the job losses were a result of the continuing travesty of Thatcherism -- the plunder of the infrastructures meant to benefit everyone for the enrichment of the elite. You can’t have 18 years of that sort of government and expect it to stop on a dime. The falling dominoes of consequence don’t respect election day deadlines.

But whatever failing the Tories had, it’s been nearly matched by Labour. They did let the banks go unchecked. They did allow Tony Blair to come under the influence of the Halliburton -- sorry -- the Bush-Cheney regime, resulting in the invasion of Iraq, and they did continue the tradition of ridiculous expense claims made by Ministers of all parties. A lot of the expense claims were technically legal, but most of them were morally reprehensible all the same. Claiming expenses for having your moat cleaned? For building a duck island? For redecorating your house? And worst of all, Parliament tried to put itself above the law and not release the detailed figures under the Freedom of Information Act. They said the Ministers had a right to privacy. Well surely they do, but does it really extend as far as not telling the public how its money was spent? If the public purchases your china for you, don’t they have the right to know what pattern you chose?

Someone on the radio recently said that this election was interesting because politicians are having to say how they would repair the Humpty Dumpty of Trust. Don’t you just love that image? The Humpty Dumpty of Trust has apparently been pushed from the wall by careless politicians jostling for some of those luscious perks paid for by the British public. Guess what? The British public now thinks all politicians are liars and cheats and general all-around arrogant bastards. Well, duh.

The main point is that the public, rightly so, is furious about the expenses scandal. And they feel just a bit smugly justified in their mutterings all these years that politicians really don’t give a flying rat’s ass about anything but themselves. We can all relate to that can’t we? But now some of the voters feel they ought to withhold their votes from politicians. And I think What? To punish them? As if the politicians will be insulted somehow. As if withholding a vote really tells those politicians what for. Haha! You didn’t get my vote you lying bastards! That will teach you. Of course most sensible people realise that withholding your vote out of spite is a bit like saying you’re going to hold your breath until you get your way.

If a member of the British voting public really cannot abide voting for any of the main parties there are alternatives. There’s the Green Party, which I would highly recommend as an antidote to the status quo, because Fair is Worth Fighting For. And there’s the Respect Party. I don’t think it’s Aretha Franklin’s gig. Their slogan is Homes, Jobs and Peace. They are definitely left of centre and according to their website they’ve got a shot at picking up three seats.

There’s also the British National Party, made up of raving fascists, which I would not recommend. There’s United Kingdom Independence Party or UKIP. I don’t know what their slogan is but it’s probably something like Making Damn Sure We Don’t Get Taken Over By Europe.

There’s also the Monster Raving Loony Party. They have three interesting policies in their manifesto:

Good Heroes
Make it illegal for super heroes to use their powers for evil.

Safe Tractors
Ban tractors from driving on roads, they can drive across their fields.

Scary Terrorists
Ban all terrorists from having beards as they look scary.

Sounds good to me.

The election is tomorrow, 6 May 2010. Will I be making an election prediction? Hmmmm. Okay.

I predict that the Tories will squeak by winning the most votes but will fail to pick up the number of seats for a clear majority.

I have no idea where Labour and the LibDems will come out, but I do think that the leader of the LibDems will be courted to form an agreement. I highly doubt that the Tories would be keen on forming an official coalition; that would be a better possibility with Labour and LibDems if Labour won narrowly. There may be a chance that the Tories would be arrogant enough to claim victory with a narrow margin and attempt to form an all-Tory government which will negotiate on a case by case basis with the other parties.

I also predict that Gordon Brown will not only be ousted as Prime Minister but also as the leader of the Labour Party. If Labour win the election, this may take a while. If they lose he’s gone by Friday morning.

I’ll get back to you all with the results in a few days. I know all four of you are dying to know.

The Peace of Wild Things

I like graffiti. I like to take pictures of it wherever I go. Most of the graffiti I see falls into three categories:

1. tagging (with subcategories of boring and wacky - both usually illegible)
2. mural (large or small scenes whether humorous, provocative, or nonsensical)
3. sticker or adhesive paper art

Making graffiti is illegal in most places and while I don't condone breaking the law, I do think it is fascinating that there seems to be a common need to leave a mark on the world, whether by scratching your name into a tree or tagging a fence or producing a full-scale piece of 'illicit' public art. I always regret being caught out without my camera, because that's usually when I see the best graffiti. I make a mental note to go back and snap a pic when that happens. I have captured some very interesting examples here in the UK. I'd like to share some of them with you.

Here are a couple of examples of sticker and adhesive paper graffiti, the skull from a London pub and the Tom of Finland meets Donnie Darko from Maidstone:

note: ASBO stands for Anti-Social Behavior Order and is a legal term in the UK

These are from an area of Brighton tucked out of the way:



These three are all from the same train underpass in Canterbury:



This one below is special to me. It falls outside of the usual three categories. It is a poem written in the same Canterbury train underpass as the above pieces. And no, it wasn't me.


It was hard to capture this one in a single frame. I loved this view of it. The words are from the following poem by Wendell Berry:

The Peace of Wild Things

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.